Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

If you cloned 12 Michael Jordan's and 12 LeBron James' and had Team Jordan vs. James, which team would win the most games?

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

What was the most inappropriate thing your parent caught you doing as a teen? Was in the bedroom, I thought nobody else was home. My sister and I shared that bedroom but I knew she was gone. I didn’t know my dad was home though.

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

I was tired of fighting.

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

Rest in Peace Fred Smith, Founder of FedEx (and Maybe the Luckiest Entrepreneur of All Time) - Inc.com

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

It’s here now, writing to you.

Why do atheists love to preach against Abrahamic religions and mock God? Even if they do not fear the eternal fire of hell, pious Muslims will certainly not leave them alone and will take brutal revenge until they surrender and repent of their sins.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

How should you brush your hair when its wet or dry?

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

What are some ways to improve speed in sprinting, running uphill, and long/middle distance running?

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

And the sadness?

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

Why do you think Islam oppresses women when Christianity clearly does it more?

You are like me, then.

The sadness was still there.

It’s still here.

Wrongly deported Kilmar Abrego Garcia returning to U.S. to face criminal charges - Axios

I was tired of trying and failing.

Be who you already are.

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

Tyrese Haliburton's Calf Injury Worries NBA Fans as Pacers Lose G5, Face Elimination - Bleacher Report

I had run out of hope.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.